Grand Theft Auto Bobby Labonte
by David Casey
Summary: Hi, I'm new here, but let's cut to the chase. This is a fantasy story about Grand Theft Auto. Rated R for somewhat a lot of bad language, not really. But GTA is just not for kids. Read & Review! CHAPTER 3 is up!
1. Chapter 1 The Escape

Chapter 1 - Escape  
  
The police van was driving across Callahan Bridge in Liberty City, California, to the Portland Island section of the city. The city has 3 sections, Portland Island, Staunton Island, & Shoreside Vale. So it would be pronounced Portland Island, Liberty City, California. Staunton Island, Liberty City, California. And Shoreside Vale, Liberty City, California. Now this police van was carrying two suspicious looking men. The men belonged to the gang Evolution Stution. Randy Orton, the 4th out of 4 leaders and one of his goons. The 3rd Leader is David Batista, the 2nd Leader is Ric Fliehr, but he shoots anyone who calls him that (he hates his last name) he prefers to be called Ric Flair, with the nickname, "The Nature Boy" or "Nach". The very top dog of Evolution Stution is Paul Levesque, however, changed his name to Hunter Hearst Helmsley and goes by the nickname Triple H. One of those men in there is Bobby Labonte. Along with his brother Terry who committed crime with him in their hometown of Corpus Christi, Texas. Terry owns a Autoyard in Portland Island in Liberty City. That he just closed for a few weeks to go visit his family in Corpus Christi. Just then, a few Evolution Stution Stretch Limos pulled up in front of the van. Triple H placed a time bomb on the road. As David Batista & Ric Flair threatened to shoot the cops if they didn't release the two members of Evolution Stution in the police van. So, the cops let the two men out. But Bobby Labonte punched the cop and got the key to get rid of his handcuffs, and did the same for Terry. They took the cop's shotgun and shot him, while the other one inside the van was KO'ed. They stole a nearby coming Chevy Malibu, since Terry's hands were tied up in bandage, Bobby has to drive. Terry started talking...  
  
TERRY: I know this guy, his name is Dale Earnhardt Jr., his real name is Ralph Dale Earnhardt Jr, but just prefers to be called either Dale Earnhardt Jr., Dale Jr. or Dale. I think he has connections with one of the gangs involved in the huge turf war around here. The gangs are Jefferson Mob Group, leader David Casey with a bunch of his members in all 3 sections, as do Evolution Stution with Triple H. But the gangs here are also The Liberty City Laclipkings. The main members are the best players of the L.A. Clippers, L.A. Lakers, & Sacramento Kings. Plus a bunch of others but bro, here in Liberty City, it's probably considered the most dangerous place on Earth. Anyhow, let's go to Dale's Club.  
  
Bobby drives the rest of the way to Dale's Club. They enter and meet Vice President, Kerry Earnhardt, Dale's Brother.  
  
KERRY: Hey! Terry! What's crackin? TERRY: Your skull if you don't shut your damn mouth! God! You are so annoying, I'm glad Dale allows me to call you names because you really deserve it. I bet if you weren't his brother and your Dad didn't leave it as a wish. You'd probably be begging to even be a driver for Evolution Stution. Which I really think you'd be good at, but anyhow, we need to see Dale. KERRY: Whatever! Dale! Come here!  
  
DALE: Yeah Kerry?  
  
KERRY: You have visitors!  
  
DALE: Hey Terry! Hey um. Terry, who's this?  
  
TERRY: It's Bobby, my brother. DALE: Oh Bobby! I've heard so much about you. Your brother Terry, here, worked perfectly for both generations of our family, he was so loyal to my father, and works pretty well for me. In fact Terry has helped me set some bombs in Evolution Stution's limos as help to the Jefferson Mob Gang. Terry is one of our best workers, especially since he owns a autoyard, but, he is great with guns too! Anyhow, Bobby, do you need some work?  
  
BOBBY: Yea, if you can fit me, plus we need some new clothes, can you get us that. DALE: Of course. KERRY! Come here! KERRY: Yea Dale? DALE: Get Bobby & Terry some clothes, they're ditching the cops and get a ride back for Terry to the autoyard. (They sit down and talk, and a few minutes later, Kerry comes back)  
  
KERRY: Ok, here's your clothes guys. (Hands them the clothes) and Terry once your changed there's a Dodge Ram waiting for you outside. DALE: Oh and Bobby, I forgot to tell you our trademark cars, we use a 6- Seat Dodge Ram, and a 6-Seat Dodge Dakota. Sometimes, I use my Dodge Stock Car. But not usually. Ok, so go get changed, Bobby, there's an empty house across the street. You can have it, my men will help you get settled.  
  
So Bobby & Terry get changed. Terry gets a ride back to his autoyard. A few hours later, Bobby's house is ready and he watches TV, plays some video games and eats dinner before he goes to bed. 


	2. Chapter 2 Jackass Jeff Gordon's Last Day

Chapter 2 - Jackass Jeff Gordon's Last Day  
  
Bobby wakes up and goes into Dale's club. Kerry meets him.  
  
KERRY: Hey Bobby, I'll get Dale. DALE! COME HERE! DALE: Yea Kerry! Oh hey Bobby, what's up? BOBBY: Not much. (Kerry leaves the room)  
  
DALE: Bobby, hey, I told you, you have work now, here's your first mission! BOBBY: Alright, cool, what is it?  
  
DALE: There's a guy named Jeff Gordon, he and a guy named Robby Gordon claim they are brothers. They aren't though. But most people think they are. I know they aren't. But they've owed me money for way too damn long! I want you to go to the Burger King at Portland View, near Portland Harbor. Go in there and block the entrance with your car, the Dodge Dakota truck. You have to kill Jeff Gordon! If there are any cops or Evolution Stution members in there either, cops have the blue suits as you know and the Evolution Stution members are in Tuxedos usually, that or T-Shirts and sweatpants. And if your wondering what's in it for you. A fantastic first- day paycheck. Now run along. And comeback to tell me, you've finished him off. The guys a mother freakin' Pretty Boy Jackass Punk. Cya later Bobby.  
  
BOBBY: Bye  
  
Bobby goes outside to see Kerry with a Dodge Dakota, and a few members of Dale's group.  
  
KERRY: Plus, here's your own Red Dodge Dakota and a few members of Dale's group to help you with your mission. You still get the same amount in your paycheck with or without these men. To be exact there's 4 of them. So 2 can sit in the front, and 2 can sit in the back. Cya Bobby, guys get in the truck!  
  
ALL 4 MEN: Yes Kerry!  
  
So Bobby gets in the drivers seat with a member in each of the front passenger seats. There's 2 members in each side of the truck's back seats. (So it's Member, Empty, Member). In a few minutes, they arrive at Burger King. Bobby blocks the entrance with his truck as him and his members go inside. Jeff Gordon is sitting by the window eating a Burger.  
  
MEMBER: Bobby, take this sniper rifle, go behind the counter and shoot Jeff. We'll take care of the cops and Evolution Stution's members. There are 2 Evolution members and 2 cops. Now! Go!  
  
Bobby walks behind the counter with the sniper rifle and takes a close aim at Jeff Gordon, he fires at Jeff's head and Jeff's head falls off. People in the restaurant start screaming and running around. Meanwhile, the members of Dale's club have shotguns, they killed the 2 members of ES (Evolution Stution) and the 2 cops. Also all the screaming people. Then they escape. They also go back to the club. In a few minutes they arrive at the club, they go inside where Dale Jr. is waiting.  
  
DALE: So? BOBBY: I killed Jeff Gordon, I shot his head off with the sniper gun. Your members killed all the screaming people, 2 members of Evolution Stution and 2 cops that were there. So the screaming people are also the workers. So there is no evidence that we did it. DALE: Good job. Bobby, here's your paycheck, eight-thousand dollars!  
  
BOBBY: Thanks!  
  
Bobby goes back to his house.  
  
At a Police Station. Chief Wiggum (THE SIMPSONS!) reports to his officers.  
  
WIGGUM: Men, we have lost 2 of our members today. Cause some local bastards killed them. OFFICER #1: OH MY GOD! WIGGUM: May those 2 officers, Rest in Peace! Rest In Hell! Rest as Fags! Rest as... OFFICER #2: Chief, you've said enough. WIGGUM: Very well, you men may get back to work.  
  
At Robby Gordon's house..  
  
The doorbell rings, a policeman is at the door.  
  
POLICEMAN: Are you Robby Gordon, sir? ROBBY: Yeah. POLICEMAN: Well, your brother, Jeff, has died!  
  
ROBBY: What?  
  
POLICEMAN: Yes, local criminals attacked Burger King and killed 26 people. Your brother was one of them. ROBBY: SHIT! I THINK I KNOW WHO DID IT TOO!  
  
POLICEMAN: Who?  
  
ROBBY: NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS! GET OUT! POLICEMAN: Ok.  
  
(Policeman leaves)  
  
At Evolution Stution's casino, Ric Flair reports to Triple H as he is watching a woman strip in front of him.  
  
RIC: Yo Hunter!  
  
HUNTER: Yeah Nach!  
  
RIC: Someone killed 2 of our members!  
  
HUNTER: So! We have tons more!  
  
RIC: Yeah oh well. HUNTER: You wanna join me Ric?  
  
RIC: Sure.  
  
At Bobby's house he is watching TV, he sees a report on the news. The newscaster Kent Brockman (DA SIMPSONS!) is reporting.  
  
KENT: In other news today, the Burger King in Portland View was attacked today by men or people. No evidence with the exception of dead bodies was found. We know that 10 workers, 2 cops, and 16 people were killed. There were no survivors. The police are investigating right now.  
  
BOBBY: (Talking to the TV) And you never will find out! HAHAHA! 


	3. Chapter 3 WARZONE: The Buildup

CHAPTER 3 - WARZONE: The Buildup  
  
Bobby woke up that day feeling great having killed Jeff Gordon. He got dressed, ate breakfast, and brushed his teeth. (NOTE: So it doesn't have to repeated, Bobby does that every day) He sat and watched the news for a while, Mike Lewis (WNEP-16) was reporting in front of Evolution Stution's club.  
  
MIKE: Well, today, a man named Hunter Helmsley was arrested for threating to kill another gang. He apparently also shouted last requests to go attack Dale Earnhardt Jr.'s Club to kill a man named Bobby Labonte. Hunter will go to court only to determine how long his stay at jail will be. Police will be in high regard in the Portland area, due to these reasons. BOBBY (Talking to himself): OH SHIT! Gotta tell Dale!  
  
Bobby ran over to Dale's club where he met Kerry.  
  
KERRY: Yes Bobby?  
  
BOBBY: Damnit, Kerry! I need to talk to Dale now! (Bobby runs off) (Bobby barges into Dale Jr.'s office)  
  
DALE: Whoa! Bobby! What's up? BOBBY: I just watched the news, it said that Triple H was arrested for killing another gang, and that other gang will probably be us! Also, he shouted last requests for his men to come attack us right here at the club! Hunter will go to court only to determine how long he will be in jail. Police will be highly in regard today if they do try to attack. DALE: I need to call my men! KERRY! I need someone to get about 60 or 70 of my men!  
  
KERRY: Ok, I'll get our Oddseys, but we need a lot of drivers. DALE: Hell with that! We have walkie-talkies in my bedroom, it connects with almost every man in our business! Tell them to come here. Come on guys!  
  
Dale gets up and signs for Bobby & Kerry to follow them, Dale, Bobby, & Kerry run into Dale's room, Dale picks up the walkie-talkie. And starts talking into it loudly.  
  
DALE: We need about 80 or 90 men at the club prondo! This is Dale, Evolution Stution is going to attack later. Over. MEMBER: Sure thing Dale, we will come.  
  
A few minutes later the members file into Dale's Club.  
  
DALE: Ok men! Bobby will tell you why Evolution Stution is going to attack.  
  
But Joshua Wolfe, Vice President of the Jefferson Mob Gang dashes into the club.  
  
JOSH: Guys! I just heard that Robby Gordon signed with Evolution Stution! Robby entered the casino, and asked Flair if he could join, Flair agreed!  
  
DALE: Oh my god! Well listen guys, I'll tell this really fast, but Josh, can you get about 25 men from your gang? JOSH: We're gonna need a lot more than that! Evolution Stution is sending in about 200 members! One of them will be 3rd President, Dave Batista! How many do you have?  
  
DALE: Eighty-Five JOSH: I'll get about 120. Cya (Josh leaves the club)  
  
DALE: Anyhow, Triple H was arrested for threating to attack us. He is sending members here to kill us! We need to fight! Also, try to target Dave Batista, the 3rd President of Evolution Stution. So, you men must fight them if we go under attack. (They sit down and wait for about 15 minutes then Josh comes back with David Casey and then the Evolution Stution attack) DALE: Oh shit! Bobby! Here's your mission, take us to an Oddsey and get us the hell out of here! Then, come back and fight in some of the war. Come on!  
  
Bobby, Kerry, David, Josh & Dale run to the Oddsey almost being shot but they make it, then Bobby starts driving, Kerry is in the passenger's seat, the middle row is empty, and in the back Dale Jr., Josh & David sat in the back.  
  
DAVID: Holy Crap! That was close! Hey Kid! Take us to my club!  
  
BOBBY: Sure thing Dave.  
  
With that, Bobby and Kerry chat as Bobby drives to the Club and Dale Jr., Josh & David chat too. Then they arrive at the club. They enter. 


	4. Chapter 4 WARZONE: The Battle

(Disclaimer: Finally, I put one. I don't own anything in this so far except for Dale Jr's Club, anything to do with Evolution Stution, the Jefferson Mob Gang, David Casey & Joshua Wolfe, but Josh is my friend, so not really do I own him, but I own him when he's a character in this story.) But anyhow, no one owns the real stuff of FANFICTION, only the made-up characters and objects, etc. I'm talking too much, anyhow, just read & review please! Thank you)  
  
CHAPTER 4 - WARZONE: The Battle  
  
All 5 men are having a conversation and the TV is on the News Channel.  
  
DALE: So anyhow, Bobby, I want you to go to the Warzone and help my men beat Evolution Stution. BOBBY: Sure, boss.  
  
KERRY: Good luck, Bobby.  
  
Then a TV Report was shown before Bobby left the club, Kent Brockman was reporting.  
  
KENT: We are reporting in a helicopter live above Dale Earnhardt Jr.'s Club, where a giant war is taking place, about 120 men in tuxedos and about 120 men in T-Shirts and Sweatpants, apparently they are 2 teams. Also the cops are getting engaged in the war, but are very unsuccesful for 2 reasons. Number 1 is the fact that the cops don't know who to try to arrest or kill, Number 2, neither team gives a damn, so, they will just kill the cops. Oh shit! Rocket Launcher! At Me! Hey Pilot, Floor IT!  
  
They barely escaped. Now we looked to the Jefferson Mob Gang's Club.  
  
DALE: Oh crap! Ok Bobby, good luck!  
  
Terry Labonte enters the club.  
  
TERRY: Bobby, I have an idea, here's what we can do, get one of our Oddseys and load it with a bomb and then tell the Evolution Stution men that they get the Oddsey. KERRY: It's not a very good idea, sorry Terry, but they will think we are suspicious. The main thing to do is just take our guns and go kill them. DALE: Bobby, here's your mission, just take a car, go to the war and kill Robby Gordon. KERRY: Dale! How the hell will he find 1 person in a 250 person war!  
  
DALE: Better idea! Get all of our members the hell out of there and then throw a few grenades to kill them all! All of the men except 10 have cars. So go and get the guys and then have 1 member in the passenger seat, 2 in the middle row, 3 in the back row, and you know how the Oddseys have that kind of trunk where you can see the driver and stuff and you don't suffocate. So get 4 back there. Then those Evolution Stution members will be taken care of. BOBBY: Ok.  
  
Bobby leaves the club and takes and Oddsey and drives to the area, he gets out and YELLS LOUDLY...  
  
BOBBY: All Jefferson Mob Gang and Dale Jr. Gang members flee!  
  
The members run and Bobby throws a 4 grenades in the areas of the Evolution Stution members, the remaining 16 members take an Evolution Stution limo. 2 of those remaining members are Robby Gordon & Dave Batista. Those other 10 members and Bobby jump into the van. They start driving away with an Evolution Stution limo on their tail. What the members of each group start doing is trying to shoot each other from out the windows.  
  
MEMBER: Bob, quick, let's switch seats and you can shoot Robby Gordon, he's shooting at my side. BOBBY: Sure.  
  
The member switches seats with Bobby really fast. Then Bobby takes his sniper rifle and aims for Robby's head.  
  
BOBBY (To himself, aiming): Aim, Zoom, Aim, Fire!  
  
He shoots at Robby's head, it falls off.  
  
(Inside the limo, the middle part where Batista and 6 other members are.)  
  
BATISTA: Oh Shit! Robby!  
  
ROBBY: Dieing! Have no head! Dead!  
  
Robby dies.  
  
BATISTA: God damn Labonte! I'm gunna fucking kill him!  
  
Batista takes his shotgun and aims out the window.  
  
BATISTA: Hey Bobby LaShithead. Look over here. BOBBY: Fuck you bitch!  
  
Bobby shoots Batista in the chest.  
  
(Back inside the limo)  
  
MEMBER: OH SHIT DAVE!  
  
MEMBER #2: OH MY GOD! MEMBER #3: KILL LASHITHEAD! MEMBER #4: His name's Labonte. MEMBER #5 (With a mask): Time to die homies, Viva La Raza! (Pulls off his mask revealing Eddie Guerrero!) EDDIE: Time to die vatos!  
  
Eddie Guerrero then takes his shotgun and kills all 5 members in that room of the limo. He then opens the back window and throws a grenade in there, he opens the door and jumps out onto the street as the limo explodes!  
  
EDDIE: Oh yeah holmes, Viva La Raza, rot in hell Batista!  
  
Eddie walks away, we look back to the van.  
  
MEMBER #1: HOLY SHIT! Eddie Guerrero just killed the members of Evolution Stution in that limo. BOBBY: Hah! Robby Gordon is dead! So is Batista! HAHAHAHA! ALL MEMBERS (INCLUDING BOBBY): Oh yeah!  
  
Bobby drives back to Dale Jr.'s Club with those other members. The 10 members walk inside in front of Bobby. Dale Jr. meets Bobby at the door.  
  
DALE: Great Job Labonte! Come back tommorrow for some more work. BOBBY: Yep.  
  
Bobby leaves and goes home, he flips on the TV. Dan Abrams is reporting.  
  
ABRAMS: We are here live across the street from Evolution Stution casino and near the sidewalk of the Portland Hospital. Apparently, a man got the dudes in T-Shirts and sweatpants (Dale Jr.'s group) out of there and threw a grenade at the men in tuxedos (EVOLUTION STUTION) blowing each and everyone except 16 up. Then the T-Shirt/Sweatpants dudes jumped into a van, 10 of those guys didn't have a vehicle, but the other men of the T- Shirt/Sweatpant dudes had vehicles, 5 jumped into each vehicle. But that's not important, 16 of the tuxedo men and a driver jumped into the limo. Apparently 1 of those 16 turned out to be Eduardo (Eddie) Guererro, who was in custody because he blew up the limo. So all of those tux men are dead. This war is over and apparently the cops were just going to let the groups handle it on there own, so they released Eddie Guerrero from the jail and he is now free too. So, the war is over and the tuxs are finished. BOBBY: HAHA!  
  
We shift to the Evolution Stution casino where Ric Flair & Triple H are in their office watching the same thing until it ended.  
  
HHH: God Damn! Orton's dead, Batista's dead, and our newest but now deceased member Robby Gordon. Jesus Christ! What the hell are we going to do. That was over half of my men, gone! GRRRRR! I was gonna make Robby the 4th President. But now I don't even have a 3rd! Nach! We have to do something about this. FLAIR: WOOO! You bet! But there's something I have to tell you.  
  
HHH: What?  
  
FLAIR: We only killed 1 member of their team. HHH: WHAT? WHAT? WHAT THE FK is wrong with my god damn team! We need REVENGE! We need it!  
  
FLAIR: I know, and that's exactly what we are going to do. 


	5. Chapter 5 Dale Jr's Incident

(DISCLAIMER: I don't own a lot of things in this. If you know enough about the celebrity world, you'll know what I do and don't own. Please Read & Review)  
  
CHAPTER 5 - Dale Jr.'s Incident  
  
Bobby Labonte woke up that morning with a very terrible feeling, he really knew something was wrong. He decided to call Terry. He dialed Terry's number and Terry picked up the phone.  
  
TERRY: Hello? BOBBY: Hey Terry! It's Bobby. TERRY: Yo, Hey Bro!  
  
BOBBY: I'm just calling because I have a bad feeling that something is going to go wrong. TERRY: I know Bro! I have that very same feeling. BOBBY: Oh well! Maybe just gas or something. Anyhow, cya later. TERRY: Bye Bobby! BOBBY: Bye Terry!  
  
Both men hang up, meanwhile, at David Casey's club. David woke up and walked downstairs in his large mansion above the Club. He sees Josh in the livingroom waiting for any jobs to do.  
  
DAVID: Morning Josh. JOSH: Morning Dave. DAVID: Josh, do you have a bad feeling that something bad is going to happen. JOSH: As a matter of fact, I do. I wonder what's going on. DAVID: Well, I'm gonna phone Terry. See what happens about that.  
  
David then walks into the kitchen and picks up his cordless phone, he dials Terry's number and Terry picks up.  
  
TERRY: Hello?  
  
DAVID: Terry! It's David. TERRY: Hey Dave! What's up? DAVID: Not much really but I do have a very funky feeling. TERRY: Yea, so does Bobby. I also do too. DAVID: Probably just gas.  
  
TERRY: Yea, that's what Bobby said. DAVID: Alright, bye Terry. TERRY: Cya Dave.  
  
Terry & David hang up. Dale Jr. wakes up in his house which is also above his club. Kerry is waiting for him in the livingroom.  
  
DALE: Good morning Kerry!  
  
KERRY: Good morning Dale!  
  
DALE: You know something, I have a funky feeling in my chest. KERRY: So do I. DALE: Well, why don't you call Terry?  
  
KERRY: Yes sir.  
  
Kerry leaves to the phone. He picks up and dials Terry's number. Terry picks up the phone.  
  
TERRY: Hello? KERRY: Yea Terry! I was wondering about something, Dale & I both woke up today with incredibly horrendus feelings in our chest. TERRY: Yea, I talked to Bobby. He has that feeling. David & Josh also have that feeling. KERRY: So the 6 of us have that feeling. Me, Dale, David, Josh, Bobby & You?  
  
TERRY: I'm afraid so. KERRY: We'll just keep our guard up. It is noted that Dale Jr. will have to get a checkup at the Doctor's. TERRY: I dunno. This may turn out to be terrible. But let's just hope for the best. KERRY: See ya Terry!  
  
TERRY: Bye Kerry.  
  
Both men hang up. Later in the day, Dale Jr. and 5 members of his club file into a Dodge Truck and ride through the area of Portland, one of the three areas of Liberty City, California. Anyhow, they arrive to the Portland Hospital. Dale Jr. gets his checkup. Although he doesn't know that Evolution Stution members are all around. Ric Flair & Triple H (Hunter Helmsley) are on the hospital's roof with about 8 members surrounding them and another 10 or 12 on the rest of the roof.  
  
HUNTER: Ok men, here's the deal, I throw a moltov cocktail at the Dodge Dakota truck down there in the Parking Lot when Dale & his goons come out. Then when they see the demolished truck, they'll walk over to it. They'll probably look up here, so I want about 8 men with the snipers to open fire on Dale's members, then I will throw another Moltov Cocktail directly at Dale Jr! Understood?  
  
RIC AND OTHER MEMBERS: Yes sir!  
  
Dale Jr. comes out of the hospital, when they are in-sight of the truck, Triple H throws his cocktail at the truck, it catches fire and explodes.  
  
DALE: WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?  
  
MEMBER #1: WOW! FIREWORKS! MEMBER #2: It came from the roof! MEMBER #3: LOOK!  
  
They look at the roof and see Triple H, Ric Flair & 6 other men aiming at them. Dale's members take out their guns and shoot at the men on the roof, Triple H drops the cocktail down at Dale Jr., Dale saw it coming and ran away from hit, however his leg caught fire. After the 6 other members on the roof were killed with 1 survivor besides Dale Jr. on his team, Ric Flair shot that last member and killed him. An Ambulance and Fire Truck came, the firemen put out the fire on Dale's leg and then the ambulance took him to the Hospital.  
  
HUNTER: I guess we did good.  
  
Then word gets out that Dale Jr is in the hospital, also that he wants to see Bobby. 


	6. Chapter 6 The Ultimate Mission!

(Disclaimer: Duh, I dont own a lot, you should know, please read and review.)

CHAPTER 6 - THE ULTIMATE MISSION!

Then word gets out that Dale Jr is in the hospital, also that he wants to see Bobby. Bobby gets out of his house and climbs into a Dodge Dakota Truck with 3 members of backup. He drives to the hospital, the 4 men walk inside. Bobby asks the nurse something.

BOBBY: Where is the room of Dale Earnhardt Jr.?

NURSE: No Dale Jr. here.

BOBBY: Ok, how bout' Ralph Dale Earnhardt Jr.?

NURSE: Ah Room 311.

BOBBY: By the way, his name is Dale Earnhardt Jr.

NURSE: Alrighty.

Bobby and the members walk into the elevator. There are 4 members of Evolution Stution in there.

ES MEMBER #1: HEY, THAT'S BOBBY LABONTE!

ES MEMBER #2: KILL HIM!

BOBBY: Oh shit! Guys fire!

There is a gun war, all of Bobby's members are dead. There is 1 ES member left. Bobby shoots him in the chest with his Pistol about 4 times. The elevator arrives to the floor and Bobby walks into Room 311. Dale is awake.

DALE: Hey Bobby.

BOBBY: Hey Yo.

DALE: I just wanted to make sure you were ok from the accident.

BOBBY: I'm fine, I wasn't even involved. Although, I had 3 members with me, but we were mobbed in the elevator. I was the only survivor overall.

DALE: Ok, I know your alright. I'll call Kerry and tell him your next mission. You can go home now.

BOBBY: Alright.

Bobby walks out of the hospital and drives his truck back to his house. Which a reminder is across the street from Dale Jr.'s club. Bobby spends the rest of the day and the night at his house.

Bobby walks over to Dale Jr.'s club. Kerry is there.

KERRY: Bobby, hey ya! I have a mission from Dale. He will give you a huge paycheck for this one!  
BOBBY: Alright, shoot.

KERRY: Go to Washington D.C. and kill President George Bush. This will be very hard. Sneak into the White House with a few members of Dale's, and then kill your way to Bush. I have 8 plane tickets for you guys. You, 6 of my members, and somebody of YOUR choice will go first to Francis International Airport on Shoreside Vale. Then you will fly to Dallas International Airport. Then from there you fly to Washington D.C. International Airport. Understood?

BOBBY: Sure thing, Kerry.

KERRY (YELLING): Ok 6 men, come out here.

6 Men come out and walk with Bobby to a Honda Oddsey. They all get in. Bobby is driving. The passenger seat is reserved for whoever Bobby picks. 2 Members are in the middle row. 3 are in the back row. And 1 is in the van's trunk, which he can breathe, see, and talk to other members. He drives to Terry's Autoyard. Terry comes out and gets in the van. They start driving to Shoreside Vale. Terry starts talking.

TERRY: Hey Bobby.

BOBBY: Hey Terry.

TERRY: Ok, here's the deal, I have a car bomb and limo with my friend Eddie Guerrero at Washington DC Airport. Here's the deal, Bobby you will drive the limo with Eddie, a member, and me in it. While one of these members will take over driving the Oddsey. And the other 4 will just sit back. Now, we drive the limo into the White House's gates. Eddie will give you a costume to look like a limo driver. Here's what we do. When Bush comes to the car, rig it with the bomb, when Bush and his bodyguards, and people to do with his campaign get in, Eddie, the member and I would already have the trunk slightly open with us in. And when we hear you shut the car door and run away, we'll follow. Then someone will have to take over and the limo will explode! Alright.

About 20 minutes later, they arrive at Shoreside Vale.

TERRY: Ok, where the hell do we go from here? Where is the airport?

MEMBER #1: Let's ask that guy for directions.

BOBBY: Alrighty.

Bobby drives over to a Mexican man who is walking across the street.

BOBBY: Where is the airport?  
MEXICAN (In a real crappy Mexican accent): That way. (Pointing to the east.)

BOBBY: Ok.

Bobby takes the directions and makes it to the airport.

BOBBY: Ok, according to my ticket. The flight leaves at 2:30 PM. What time is it now?

TERRY: 2:10 PM.

BOBBY: Oh shit! Let's go.

They get out of the car and run to the baggage check-in, they wait for about 3 minutes and then go through the security check. Bobby has a machine gun hidden in his baggage but is not identified. They go onto the airplane, about 20 minutes later while the plane is headed to Dallas. A guy has a mind reader, funky invention. He reads Member #3's mind. The guy speaks out.

GUY: That guy is planning to kill George Bush! (Pointing to Member #3)

MEMBER #3: I'm gonna kill you for revealing that! (Takes out his shotgun and kills the guy)

MEMBER #4: HEH!

EVERYONE: AHHH!  
SOME IRAQI DUDE WHO SEEMS TO BE THE PILOT: I am a hijacker!

EVERYONE: AHHHH!

Bobby shoots the pilot.

BOBBY: Ok, I'll make you people a deal, do not tell anybody I killed him and I'll take over this plane.

EVERYONE: Deal.

Bobby drives the plane to Dallas.

TERRY: Ok, so let's go.

MEMBER #2: Hey wait, how did you know how to fly, Bobby?

BOBBY: Well, when I was a NASCAR driver, some pasttime of mine, well, anyhow, one of my fellow drivers, Mark Martin, his sponsor is Viagra, crapface, anyhow, he taught me how to fly planes.

MEMBER #2: Ok.

TERRY: Well, we are headed to Gate 5B as our flight is headed to Washington D.C. International Airport.

BOBBY: Terry, isn't Eddie Guerrero a Mexican Immigrant?  
TERRY: Yeah, so?

BOBBY: Heh, and people are concerned about Iraq invaded to destroy Homeland Security.

TERRY: Why are you being mean about Eddie? Besides, his parents were immigrants, he was born in El Paso.

BOBBY: So that's between 250-600 miles southwest of Corpus Christi?  
TERRY: Yep.

BOBBY: Ok.

TERRY: Here's the gate, let's get our baggage checked.

The baggage is checked, the weapons are deeply hidden, so they are not revealed. They get on the plane. The flight is a while. The flight finally arrives at Washington D.C., they find Eddie.

EDDIE: New plan guys, we get a hotel tonight, then kill Bush tommorrow. Apparently, Dale Jr. is a Democrat.

TERRY: So, the same plan, except we get a hotel?  
EDDIE: Yep.

BOBBY: Ok, how do we wipe out Bush?  
EDDIE: Remember our 6 crew members, me, you, and Terry.

BOBBY: Ok.

(The next morning)

EDDIE: Good morning, vatos, ready to roll?

TERRY: Why so early?  
EDDIE: Because, duh. We need to pick them off their feet.

TERRY: Ok

(1 Hour Later)

They drive the limo into the parking lot of George W. Bush's White House. Eddie puts the bomb in the limo. He notes for the members to go away and hide behind the shrubs while Bobby & Terry hide in the back. Finally, Bush comes out and gets in the passenger seat of the Limo.

BUSH: So I guess your my limo driver. Huh?

EDDIE: NO VATO! (He runs out and turns off the limo. Bobby & Terry jump out of the back, The Secret Ser vice is firing uncontrollably, they all make it out.)

BUSH: Alright Jamie (Secret Service Man)! Drive the limo!

Bush gets in the back and Jamie starts up the car. BOOM! Explosion!

TERRY: Yes, it worked!

So, they flew back to Liberty City. And the drove to Dale Jr.'s club.

DALE: So...

BOBBY: Bush is dead!

DALE: YES! Here take $1 million dollars.  
BOBBY: Holy shit!

DALE: But that's also for your last mission. Which is too easy and only has $1,000 dollars involved. $999,000 is from the Bush mission. So, here's the deal, drive Terry back to the Autoyard and then drive Eddie to Eddie's Ammunation in the other side of town. If I need any help, I'll call ya ok?  
BOBBY: Yep.

Bobby drives Terry back to the Autoyard, and Bobby has just dropped Eddie off at Eddie's Ammu-Nation. Eddie is saying last words to Bobby.

EDDIE: Ok, Bobby. Come to my store tommorrow at 9:30 AM sharp, ok vato?

BOBBY: Sure thing, Eddie!

EDDIE: Cya, holmes!

BOBBY: Cya.

Bobby drives back to his now bigger house due to the massive $1 million dollar paycheck. Bobby is watching the news before hitting the sack. Kent Brockman is reporting from the White House in Washington D.C.

KENT: I'm Kent Brockman from the White House in Washington D.C. where three people set off a bomb in a Limo that President George Bush got into.

BOBBY: Nine you bastard!

KENT: George Bush is dead! John Kerry will face Ralph Nader in this year's Presidential Election, but Kerry will probably win.

BOBBY: Duh.

Bobby's cellphone rings. He answers it.

BOBBY: Yo, it's Bobby.

Eddie Guerrero is talking.

EDDIE: Yo vato, I just opened up a Noodle Shack in Chinatown. You wanna come see me?  
BOBBY: It's late. Tommorrow I'll come down after I see if there's anything left from Dale.

EDDIE: Ok, holmes, cya.

BOBBY: Cya, Eddie.


End file.
